Angrez

Angrez is a movie that one shouldn’t miss watching. In fact, I hadn’t seen it for a long time even though good feedback from friends and others persistently flowed in. Finally, when I watched it a couple of years ago, couldn’t help rolling on the floor clutching my stomach.Yesterday, I watched it with some friends for the nth time and the result is the same. The movie is hilarious to the hilt. The city’s Urdu-Hindi slang is a real blast, underscoring the arrogant, nonchalant Hyderabadi attitude.

Set in the backdrop of Old City (Hyderabad), which is insanely popular for its sizzling biryanis and pipping Irani chais, the whole story hinges on a small tussle, which two NRIs accidentally pick up with a bunch of Old City lads. During the tussle, one of the NRIs holds a part of Ismail Bhai’s kurta and it accidentally gets torn. (Ismail Bhai is sort of a ring leader for these local lads). Frankly, the NRI doesn’t even do it intentionally he only hangs on to his camera in the process the damage is done. The way this small issue enrages into a full blown war with a rib-tickling comedy is awesome to watch.  

If Ismail Bhai, who is hoodwinked into footing the bill every time, doesn’t get you the laughs, then his team disguising as “Pilumbers & Kileaners” in a bid to enter the NRIs’ office will certainly do. The laughs don’t stop there. Things turn out real hot for these lads as the tables are turned against and they end up cleaning toilets instead of cleaning out the NRIs for good.  

What splits your sides with laughter are the satirical dialogues. Here’s one for takers. Salim Pheku comes and updates Ismail Bhai, “Parsoon Ruksana mili thi. Pooch rahi thi Ismail Bhai kaise hai. Suna hai unhe Angrezaan kundal kundal ke mare?! Ismail Bhai, at the brink of breaking down in frustration, retorts, “Ab Ruksana Ko bhi maloom hogaya?”

In another incident where Ismail Bhai is in an ecstatic mood while Salim Pheku is dancing his shoes away on some festive occasion, a woman approaches Ismail Bhai and says “Salam Walaikum, app ko angreza parsoon mare kathena?". The suddenness of the dialogue without proper introduction livens up the hilarious factor several notches up. You can’t but appreciate the director for his raw and unforgiving approach. Mind you, I am merely quoting a few dialogues but the whole movie is laden with such deadly discourses - one is  guaranteed to have a blast watching this movie.

Except for the part where NRIs come in, the other parts of the movie are just too riotous. And the rap song in the middle I felt was little too lengthy. That apart, this shoe string budget movie is sure to knock your socks off with its uproarious scenes and killer dialogues. 

The Reluctant Fundamentalist - Mira Nair

There are questions flying all around as to why Mira Nair is not able to arouse the same feelings in the movie “Reluctant Fundamentalist” as is the case with the book written by Mohsin Hamid. I, for one, presume it’s asking a little too much. Let’s appreciate what she has done. It’s no cakewalk to take a story and translate it into a movie.  There is a good deal of things which needs to be considered. One, the book is a narrative - where the description of events is the only base to build a movie platform. Second, it revolves around a story that’s more to do with inner conflict than outer settings. Third, it’s a one-sided narrative, where the other characters are dimmed beyond clear understanding and hang around like mere shadows. So, on the whole, it’s a pretty complex theme to portray and hold the attention of the viewers. Considering all this, Mira Nair has done her bit admissibly well.

Take for instance, Changez’s personality both physical and mental – portrayal of which is uncannily difficult. Yet, in the movie, Changez is remarkably the character you have imagined - Fair, lanky, sharp-looking, emotional and unmistakably Pakistani. The team at Underwood Samson is what an American team generally is: all awe for oriental acumen and occidental self-righteousness. Erica is no scented flower either, with emotions that run high and dry – acting precisely at her own whims and fancies. Let’s not forget Changez’s superior who has his eyes set on molding Changez into a game changer. Mira has captured the soul of these roles.

Probably the thing that kind of throws the spanner in is that the movie is bit on the gloomier side. You could feel the icy cold hands of melancholy reach out and grab you. I kind of detested it. Reading about gloom in a book is different from reading it on faces on-screen. As they say a picture is worth a thousand words, emotions have come out strongly - much to the discomfort of the viewer. Another error that’s a soar thumb - by bringing in a dialogue between Changez and the American, who remains voiceless in the book, Nair has touched a painful nerve. Ambiguity sometimes holds its own ground. The moment you disclose, the essence is lost. I would have liked it if the American had remained in the shadows with his voice as a fragment of Changez’s imagination, just as it was in the book.

Barring a few errors such as these, the film’s good. If you see the flick prior to reading the book you wouldn’t have second thoughts about branding Mira Nair as a “Nut”. But otherwise, you cannot miss appreciating her eye for detail, settings, characters, and other trivia that goes into making a decent film. Though it may sound shocking to many, I kind of liked the movie. The book was nominated for a Booker Prize so it’s no James Bond movie to keep you at the edge of the seat. It’s a classic. So bear with it. As they say, “Every concave lens is a convex lens too, depending on which side you are viewing from”. I sure would like to view it form a different perspective.

Darren Lecroix - The World Champion of Public Speaking

When Darren Lecroix says, “I became a comedian because I was willing to fail” you know he’s not joking.

Oration 2013, an annual event of Toastmasters, which was held at Novotel, Hyderabad, was simply mind blowing. Unfortunately, I couldn’t take time out to be present there for all days but took just enough time to manage to listen to Darren Lecroix, who won the international Toastmasters’ speech contest sometime ago. What makes me burn with envy is his ability to be as natural on stage as he is with you talking one-on-one. For that matter, I have always envied public speakers. Feel no shame in saying I turn completely green-eyed when I see the influence they hold. And I secretly long for it. So, it shouldn’t come as a surprise that my heart longs to be a part of toastmasters club, but unfortunately the time schedule often plays the devil – And I am left wandering to events only as a guest not as a Toastmaster.

Darren’s insights on public speaking were subterranean and effective. He says he is inspired by the former world champion’s statement: Never turn down stage time. Acting on this, he always ensures he hasn’t a moment to lose on stage but looks for ways to bettering his performance, every time. He adds, “Learning is a constant process. One needs to ask and acquire feedback. You don’t know, what you don’t know, period”.

He methodically takes us through the performing process. He explains, “Imagination is powerful. So don’t elucidate everything to the audience. When I say I went to a Xerox shop saw reams of paper and the sheets shooting out of Xerox machine, I have given just enough data to build that up in one’s imagination”. He then questions the audience, “Now, tell me what was the colour of the walls in the Xerox shop?” The audience screamed: “Blue”, “Brown”, “Green”…. He explains: “See, I have never mentioned that.  But your imagination has gone to all the Xerox shops you have ever visited and picked up the colours. Similarly, in speaking you don’t give too many details and confuse the sub-conscious. Just touch the canvas. Don’t paint it. Some things are better left unsaid”. I was like…Wow. Amazing. I didn’t know that. In fact, I got scribbling all these so many not-to-missed parts into my notes that I almost ran out of paper. Another gem of an advice he gave us was, “Don’t pause for effect. Pause to reflect”.

He left us with some probing questions. Ask yourself. As a public speaker, what do I want my audience to do, think and feel after I am done speaking? What will they remember 3 days after I speak?  Was my opening and closing impacting? When he says speaking is not a monologue but a dialogue, you wonder… if it's right? Eventually, Darren proves it is. When it got finished. I came out with my head still in the clouds. I had an absolutely rocking time. Darren Lecroix sure has a bagful of tricks when it comes to public speaking. Little wonder he is at the top of his game! 

Robin Williams - Going Faces!

Robin Williams is an exceptionally talented actor. I guess this new generation would find it a tad difficult in identifying him. Perhaps they would identify Robin William (a singer of certain repute) but not Robin Williams. His acting prowess exceeds others in his genre. In fact, Jim Carey took couple of leaves from his book.  Ironically, Robin Williams and Jim Carey have hell of a similarities. Both were stage performers. Both do amazing impersonations. Both dreamed of doing big banner movies but didn’t get that right break for a longtime. Another thing I learnt about Jim Carey, which kind of totally altered my perception, is: When Jim Carey wasn’t a big star; he wrote a million dollar cheque on his name and kept it in his purse, saying one day I am going to receive a cheque like this for one of my movies - which he eventually did. Now, that’s what I call power of positive thinking. Ever since then, I haven’t let my dislike for his overacting come in between judging him as an actor and appreciating him as an individual.

However, as an artist, Robin Williams’ a shade better than Jim Carey for the clear reason that Jim perpetually goes overboard on his role. And some of his idiosyncrasies drive most people up the wall. However, there is this one chartbuster movie, where his acting skills rocked! –‘The Mask’. No denying anybody would have done better than him. He scored a perfect ten on it, excluding this one movie, I guess every one of his movies is little overbearing.  Robin Williams, on other the hand, has every hair in its place. Delivering just what the role requires and what the audience needs. Be it acting like a 40-year old kid, or donning on the role of woman with élan, or putting on those scientist’s glasses and forgetting to attend his own wedding, or the doctor who treats patients psychologically first and anatomically next…he has multiple on-screen facades that kind of wire differently and make you sit up and take notice.

His stage performances are hilarious yet articulate. He once featured in one of those intellectually thought-provoking shows, “Whose Line It Anyway” where Drew Carey - even though Drew is the anchor of the show – is butt of all jokes. Of course, when you put a deadly team of individuals together you can’t stop those fiery arrows fly around, even when it means at you! Anyways, in a show like this where you need to be at the top of your game or else someone is bound to steal your pants; Robin Williams managed to steal everybody’s pants. Talk of talent! The man’s a blob with viscosity that could transform itself into any form. Now, now, you might say so much of adulation is uncalled for?! But check this bit in the movie, Mrs. Doubtfire, where he does ‘Voices’…and you will know what I mean. And don’t you miss out on his impersonation of the ‘Hot Dog’!

Alice Fredenham – Amazing Talent!

When this gorgeous lady first featured on 'The Voice’, the judges did what they were not supposed to do. They didn’t turn around. Of course, the song she chose for the blind auditions was a Jazz song – which anybody with a good sense of music and a keen perception of her voice, could have guessed it’s an awfully bad choice. But then, judges should have taken note of that sultry voice - that liquid gold – as another panelist on a different show later describes her voice. But instead each judge (Will, Jessie Danny and Tom) went on to give their description of why they haven’t chosen her. So much so, that her spirit was almost broken. Its one thing to stand on stage and sing and quite another to take all the stuff the panelists dish out. The Voice (UK Version) – simply threw her out. I guess her confidence got sapped. For that matter anybody’s could have – When you think you are a professional and four of them agree you are not! It’s kind of creepy as hell!!!

When she featured on ‘Britain’s Got Talent’ – Boy! Am I glad she did it – she was so nervous, you could see her hands all fidgety and her composure shaky. But then like a true warrior of this world, she came back to compete. The scars of losing were evident as she hasn’t told a soul that she had come for auditioning on ‘Britain’s Got Talent’. Unlike earlier, this time her choice of song was bang on. Looking at her nervousness, anybody would have thought her voice would crack or she would go off track, but nothing of that sort happened…instead it was spell-bound silence in the wall-to-wall packed auditorium as her voice probed the depths of hearts and rang like gentle chimes in the ears, raising the hair on the back of the neck. It was simply amazing!

Finally, the judges did what they were supposed to. Voted for her! All ‘Yeses!’ True. Alice has a long way to go. But since her voice fits a certain variety of music, will she really deliver the knocks on all genres? That’s the issue in question. But knowing Alice, one can never be sure of what surprise she can throw…

Here’s the video of her singing the sultry number “My Funny Valentine”.

Masters of Voice

It's awesome  the way reality shows are shaping up these days. No. I am not talking about regional ones. But those like the Britain’s Got Talent, America’s Got Talent, The Voice, American Idol...the likes. The opportunities these talent shows offer to unknown individuals are simply awesome. I recall stories from couple of years back which literally transformed lives. In fact, Susan Boyle’s story is a striking example. When she first featured on ‘Britain’s Got Talent’ it brought tears. The way people initially discounted her for the casual looks and speech, talks about the universal mentality of judging the book by the cover. Moreover, when she aired her feelings of becoming a professional singer on the lines of Elaine Page, you could easily spot people in the audience snickering with unbelief. In fact, Simon Cowell, keeping with his usual critical approach, went ahead pulling her leg. But the moment she opened her mouth. It was mind-blowing. You thought angels have descended and sang to you. It was amazingly awesome. The whole place reverberated with a kind of soothing rhapsody you wouldn’t want to stop listening to. Simon’s expression from utter confusion to sheer disbelief to total happiness was something that was completely worth watching. The judges on the show couldn’t feign ignorance of what they were listening to either. When she finished everyone knew they found a new star.

After that Susan Boyle’s life, I believe, has never been the same. She went on to sing with her singer idol – Elaine Page. And guess what?! All this has been possible by a simple reality show. Isn’t that surprising?!  

What about the story of Landau Eugene Murphy Jr? Before he participated in ‘America’s Got Talent’, he was nobody. Washing tyres in a small time garage. Then everything changed when he entered the contest. He came in chewing on gum, caring two hoots for the crowd and then walked away pocketing a million bucks. Amazing, isn’t it.  That’s the beauty of reality shows. While these reality shows titillate the crowds, they also provide platform for newfangled talent. Unlike our regional shows, where TRP ratings are spiked, emotions are intentional made to run high, the western shows come with a candidness that’s awe-inspiring. 

One of these shows which kind of grabbed my eyeballs right from its very start is ‘The Voice’. Where judges are seated with their backs turned to the singer. So, only when judges like the performance of the singer, they push the button and are instantly turned around to view the singer. This, I feel, is a fair deal. The performer is not tested on his looks but on his talent. The talent featured on ‘Voice’ is also of amazing standards. So, I was not completely taken aback when I saw a youngster sing ‘Love on Top’.  It’s originally sung by Beyonce Knowles, but I find this performer’s voice more peppy and scorching. Check this video to find out how good a singer she is…

Unforgettable IPL Tunes!

When I first found out Farah Khan is a choreographer, I was like…Are you kidding me?! You mean she can dance?!  Now, after seeing her flash a step or two in those ridiculously hilarious ads of IPL, I must admit I had to eat the humble pie. Each of those ads was well-synchronized and totally rib-tickling. If not for the cricket frenzy, the on-going IPL should attract fans for its spicy, heavily punch-laden ads.  

My favourite of course is the one where Farah Khan barges in on a kitty party. The ladies who look like they are used to dunking biscuits by threes-n-fours into their gossipy mouths and drinking coffee by the pots, are caught completely unawares. And when they do the jig, that ridiculously comical, “Dil Jumping Japang Jampak Jampak..Dhamping Dhapang Dhampak Dhampak Gile Gile A.”…. Especially the crunching of knuckles on the sides of their heads…it’s a must-watch. These ladies, who look like sumo-wrestlers of sorts, rock the show. When I say they rock, well, I mean they really ROCK!

The other ad isn’t bad either, where Farah Khan gatecrashes into boardroom and makes those professionals dance to her tune. Well, who cares what the tune is like, as long as one can watch these straight-faced, blue-tied veterans dance like garish teenagers in some god forsaken island! The side-splitting part is when Farah gestures to a guy to ruffle hair and the guy gives a god-forgive-me look because he’s completely bald. She then rolls her eyes and mutters under her breath not his hair but ruffle the other guy’s. That, kind of loosens up this guy and he goes on to prove to Farah khan he is the best dancer in the boardroom. Hilarious!

With a few shades of variations on these ads and Farah does the unimaginable. Bowls you over. Again and again. You can’t but smile when she vocalizes those unmistakably, typical Mumbai-styled words  “India Iss Baar Sirf Dekhne Ka Nahi”. That’s when I decided – not for the sake of Virat, Dhoni, Sachin, Chris Gayle, Brendon McCullum or any other – but for Farah’s sake I am going to watch this season’s IPL. Who knows, might even manage the jig when no one’s looking.