A trip to Vijayawada, a few packets of Kurkure, and a Kinley water bottle.

It sums it all. I mean my absence on the web.

I unexpectedly took a journey that was long and unimaginably boring. Actually, I had never been to Vijayawada. Consequently, when a client requested me to meet him there, I found the idea rather tempting. So, the next morning, I caught a bus that headed towards Vijayawada. Although the journey was long, it was this rollicking telugu movie which was played on the bus that cut the journey short. The film was a take off on the English movie, Dirty Rotten Scoundrels (with actors: Steve Martin and Michael Cain). I don’t quite recollect the title of the telugu movie but it would be injustice if I say the movie was hilarious. Had it not been for the armrests on the seat, I would have been down on the floor laughing. One thing I truly admire about telugu movies is, you absolutely have no parallels when it comes to witty humour. The slang, the punch lines, the versatility … I somehow feel the southern film makers are miles ahead when it comes to scripting side-splitting humour.

The movie which followed was also equally hilarious. It was as if the driver somehow knew that a guy who is fanatical about telugu movies was clandestinely undertaking a journey to Vijayawada. Or, it could be that the driver is just another individual who relishes humourous telugu movies. Either way, the journey wasn’t a bit drab or boring, I mean at least in the ‘first half’.

Since I had taken an early morning bus, I couldn’t gorge on my breakfast. So when the bus took a halt, the hunger pangs made me scamper to the nearest refreshment counter, where Juhi Chawla with her innocent smile on the Kurkure Packet beckoned me to own her. I bought two Juhi Chawlas along with a bottle of Kinley water bottle. (Contrary to the belief that water is tasteless, Kinley water tastes wonderful! Trust me). That was my ration for the day. After I landed at Vijayawada, The meeting with the client went off smoothly. He had a huge property and anyone could make out he was filthily rich by looking at his two Mercedes Benzes in the portico which dwarfed against a colossal structure – his office! Surrounding it was his 80-acre land. The client was young, effervescent and dynamic, radiating optimism from every angle. We struck a chord somewhere while our interests tallied. Finally, we decided to meet one last time before finalizing on the business trivia.

The journey back was boring. I got stuck in Vijayawada for what seemed like years. The place where I stayed lacked internet accessibility. Moreover, on the return journey, there were no telugu movies. That’s because there was no TV on the bus. But APSRTC promptly charged the same amount for the ticket as that of a DVD coach! Pathetic. Furthermore, the seat I sat in was extremely uncomfortable it felt like I was traveling in an auto. And imagine an auto ride that is around 450 kms. Unimaginable!

I reached Hyderabad at an unearthly time of about 2.30 am. Stepped out of the bus into the inky darkness and thought: Is life really worth all this? Maybe…